People what’s happened in the last couple of years? Exactly!

Talk about mental as anything.

The sh*t hit the fan and there was no toilet paper to clean it with.

Me? I’d been in physical lockdown, sexually that is, for most of my life.

And I don’t wanna brag but... my hot husband and I clocked up a lot of ‘Rooting Frequent Flyer’points.

Yep, I went from Bronze to Platinum in nine months.

But we’re finally out. Out of the House and Out of the Pantry.

Seriously, it was so bad I thought about writing a COVID memoir called ‘Eat, Pray, Eat.’

Come see my hit stage show, ‘Better Out Than In.’ And let me lift youse up where youse belong!

“Effie still manages to shock and surprise her audience every time she opens her mouth.”

- Adelaide Advertiser